The old dude

And till the next time

2010-06-21T06:00:00.004+08:00

21.6.2010

3 romances, if they can be called romances.
Today, I'm going to shut down andr30407's home and stop blogging on here.
There's only so much that a blog should be allowed to contain, before it starts becoming a part of me so big that I can only look at it in regret.

I wish to keep this memories intact though, for those that were in my life, I thank you and you certainly have every right to peruse these little figments of my memory.
For those that are still in my life, I thank you too for bearing with me all these while.
For those that would come into my life, I welcome you with open arms, though I beg your pardon if you find me to be a tad too detached or rational. Or, as what do they call it, schizophrenic.

Towards my 21st year in life.
Cheers.

Rants

2010-06-06T21:33:00.002+08:00

6.6.2010
For some reason not obvious to me, for the CA starting tomorrow I am not in the least bit nervous.
No last minute panic. Nothing.
Matured? Or desensitised?
I don't know.
I need a drink.

Conclusion

2010-05-29T18:56:00.002+08:00

29.5.2010
And so, exactly 1 year, 3 months and some 5 hours later, we reached a consensus.
We will be friends instead.
If I were to tell anyone that I don't mean it, I'll be lying, because it's something that I have to do.
If I were to tell anyone that I'm not affected, I'll be lying, because while the going is good, I truly am happy and content.

Just to reiterate some things I had promised you,
I would be here should you need anything.
I would do my best to help you to the best of my abilities.
I will be a loyal friend to you.
I will always try to face you like the person you knew.
I... will miss you.

Thank you for all the good times and bad, and a time most memorable.

Rants

2010-05-12T12:22:00.000+08:00

12.5.2010

What doesn't fit, never would.
At most, it is merely a contortion of what was meant to be.
-----------------
Sometimes it just goes beyond the scope of a mere farce.
Ever have this feeling overpowering sense of emptiness when you leave a party?
Whatever happened to the fun and laughter?
What happened to the thought of "Wow. I'm wanted." ?
-----------------
Humans and sheep share a common trait.
No, not that we are all mammals.
No, I meant that on a psychological level.
The Sheeps' Effect.
When a flock of sheep is herded in a certain direction, the odds are a lone one will run towards them, regardless of its wish to wander off in another direction.
Humans exhibit an uncanny resemblance to this phenomenon.
When there are a large crowd somewhere moving towards a locale, chances are the lone person will follow, even if he don't know the purpose behind the march.

Is it wrong to be different, to stand out from the rest?
Is it undesirable, to be conscientious about work, and the skimp on the frivolities?
Is it wrong to stay true to one's principles?
Is it wrong, to simply want to be understood?

Rants

2010-04-24T00:29:00.003+08:00

24.4.2010
Just been through a week of classes with this this bunch of young people. It's a good feeling to finally be in control of life again.

Got to watch the spending a little, for I just realized that this class isn't as reserved as it looks. And I resolve to consume less fast food. Food Court 5 is not the place to be for wholesome, healthy food.

Chatted a little with Amelia over her issue. Matters of the heart can be confusing for these young people, and perhaps it's just fate that they have me to maybe give my input here and there. Note to self: you are not God, and don't try to solve everything.

Tomorrow(actually later, given that it's already past midnight) I would start training at Pomo for Singapore Pools, and I didn't do my research. At all. I'll just have to bluff my way, then.

I need a drink.

Rants

2010-04-20T11:05:00.003+08:00

20.4.2010
Classes has started.

Time to put down my persona of an old guy and just behave like any other young person out there. :D

Need a job.

Afresh

2010-04-16T19:34:00.002+08:00

16.4.2010
It's been 3 years. I could hardly believe myself, as cliched as that may sound.

I was young, and I was dumb. No one would be so headstrong as to think that he can solve all his problems himself, if he didn't have the resources to begin with.

Now, I return to where it all begins: SP.

Well, if you ever stepped and fell headlong into a pit, there's little chance that you would allow yourself to ever repeat the same blunder again, no?

A new chapter, my life starts afresh, and I would be a better man.

School, and the lack of $$ again

2010-04-06T15:44:00.002+08:00

6.4.2010
It wasn't until the call woke me up that I realized that it is 10am in the morning already. Yes, the issue that had been bugging me all the while had finally resolved itself: I get a second shot at attempting tertiary education full time.

But to say that it is opening up another can of worms is to say the least. I find it hard to cough up about $200 in such a short notice. And what goes of the course materials?

Worry never seems to want to leave me, do it?

Complaint

2010-02-25T18:06:00.000+08:00

25.2.2010
So it's true when people tell me the closer to the date of ORD, the harder things seem.

2010-02-09T11:16:00.000+08:00

7.2.2009
It's an exercise in futility.
The more I try, the more gravity seems to exert it's pull on me, dragging me along.
Almost, I feel as though I am staring it in the eye but sees only a sneer. That I cannot combat it.
Yes. I cannot defy age.

The more I try to stand from a 3rd person's view and look at things at a holistic manner, the more it is apparent to me. No, I don't feel at ease conversing with individuals about my age. I'd much rather talk to real adults, thank you.

I was at Anne's birthday party at the chalet at Aloha Loyang yesterday. I had the mind to kick myself in the nuts for doing something so masochistic. I was in an environment where I am totally alien to everyone, and the problem with the crowd was that they did not have the sense to make everyone feel at ease and at home.

I shifted on the bench that I was sitting on, after signing the guestbook in the little apartment that is supposed to be Anne's chalet. I cringed inside. I get the feeling that the kids that I am silently observing at the chalet just by Anne's was paying much more attention to me. Yes, there were a few that tried to talk, but talk was it. No conversation. No chat. I got so bored that immediately after the cake- cutting I informed Anne and I silently left.

Even later, after a very short bus ride into Pasir Ris and I found myself going down the aisle in the supermarket at White Sands did I feel more at ease. There's no inane topics being discussed, no problems that were brought up that didn't even qualify as problems in the first place(at least to me, in a word of fairness for the kiddos out there). Everything was sensible. Even the price tags, simple slips of paper with words and numbers and barcodes on them made more sense to me than living human beings. Or rather, what I would very much like to believe is human. If a knock on them yields a rich bassy resonance I wouldn't be much surprised, or if they cracked like egg shells. They, to me, were little more than empty vessels and shells.

-----------------------------
This month is bound to be a tight one. I've channelled all the cash for new clothes into the purchase of multitools. Just picked up a Leatherman Skeletool CX from a gentleman from a local forum, and I would say that his price is darn good. Would be meeting another gent from the same forum later to pick up a pre- owned LM Micra. It's a good day.

Whilst I was shopping around just now about the Novena area I stumbled across shops that carried impressive ranges of tools and knifes. I was in dreamland.

But everyone almost stocks similar stuff. What would set them apart is the people that run them. There's this store on the spiral pathway in Chinatown Point, Adventure 21, that I've returned to time and again just to look at their merchandise. Today I talked to it's owner(I presume), Alex, who was exceptionally friendly and taught me things on tools. I am impressed.

Would my passion for tools last long? I daren't say, but for while it lasts, I think I'm going to be very good at the subject. Who knows, I'll own a store on gear and equipment just like Alex some day..

Rants

2010-01-02T18:32:00.003+08:00

2.1.2009
It's a new year.
Let me start off with some resolutions.

1. To get back into my polytechnic education, and
2. at the same time, get a part time job to support myself, while
3. maintaining my grade at a passable level.
4. To not incur any debt over the coming academic year
5. To imbibe less alcohol(hahaha)
6. And to watch my spending so I don't have to rely on eating instant noodles for every meal.

The last time I was at SP.. I had troubles with all of the clauses above.
I am determined not to let that happen again.

The nerves behind waiting for the 2009's O'levels results to be released is terrible. Not that I am one of the candidate but simply knowing that I have to compete with so fresh and young school leavers makes me feel unhinged.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
My s10-2's keyboard went bonkers on me. The space bar, when punched once, yielded a space, then lots of backslashes. Like this. " \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\...
I am going to send it in for repair as soon as the weekend, well, ends.

But for the purpose of study, I think I am going to need another laptop... which means I've got to come up with another way of getting the money.

: <

Rants

2009-12-29T23:29:00.002+08:00

29.12.2009
Haha. So much for the promise to myself to blog as often as I could.

The year is drawing to a close, and just like the last year, it's probably time to ponder over what is that next step in my life.
The last time I was doing this I had just been posted to 36th, and it didn't occur to me that a year could literally skip past THAT fast. Had I been a little more lackadaisical about it, I would have been caught with panic come my ORD in March.
But, no. I am adamant about not letting something like that happen to me, much like lots of guys that are spending time in the army after dropping out/terminating themselves out of their courses in whichever tertiary institutions they may be attending(or rather, not. Haha).

Thus, this would be a rough sketch of my plans for the next 3 years.
1. Go back to Poly and get my goddamned diploma.
2. And while I'm at that, get a job, part- time, so that I may feed my own pathetic little self.

Sounds terribly simple, but it's terribly difficult. What if I tell a kid, probably about 15-21 years of age, to go out there and work to support themselves through school? I can already see in my mind's eye that I would be met with many a middle finger or cold blank stares and coos that go,"aw. He's a mad one."

And coming through with this, I could safely say that in the future, I
1. Would be responsible enough to furnish my child(ren) with the ability to concentrate on their schooling years to er, school, and just goof around like normal kids;
2. Or in the unforeseen and unfortunate and probably impossible situation(laughs) that I fail to do that(god forbid), I would not even try to have kids. AT ALL. TIE ME UP DOC. Hahaha.

I was at Grandpa's the other day when a bunch of non- tech savvy aunts and cousins was trying to video call another aunt of mine whose family is residing in the US. After much exasperation, my cousin on the other side managed to get the connection via Skype up with me. YAY. It wasn't until I reached home did I actually realize that his link to his myspace page was on his Skype contact details as well.
As the page loaded, I felt the space around me getting colder as my eyes took in the stream of words and pictures on that blog. My goodness. Is that the same boy, the one who followed me around as a boy and couldn't get enough of attention? No.
It was apparent to me that he was a changed man. I couldn't say for better or worse, though.

So much was going through my mind over the course of these weeks that past; so much, I have problems deliberating them one by one. Then again,I think it would be much better and safer that more of the other issues stay in my spanking new organizer/ diary. Hahaha.

And before I forget, an early Happy New Year and a doggone late Merry X'mas to all my friends and loved ones.

I wonder

2009-12-05T20:28:00.002+08:00

5.12.2009
True to myself, I found time to blog.
This time, this activity happened to take place whilst I'm working.
The only exasperating thing is that the job appeared to us like a farce. If there are no means to keep the water from dripping onto the floor, why dry it in the first place?

No surprises though.
Perhaps the lesson that I find to repeatedly present itself to me is the one about taking everything easy. To dissect a big problem and solve it in manageable portions. To tackle the problem at hand instead of finding fault with whoever tripped it in the first place.

To swallow.
To swallow the problems, the accuses.
To swallow my ego.

Is that why guys are worth more after serving time in the army? Because we got used to the abuse and can fit into the working society as individuals that are dehumanized to extents?

I wonder.

And to pick up the pace

2009-12-05T00:36:00.002+08:00

5.12.2009
ETEP's over, and what's left for me in the army is probably grunt jobs before I leave and return to being a student all over again.

And to pick up the pace, I decided that I needed to blog as often as I could manage, just so that I could teach myself to piece words together in a coherent and grammatically correct way, all over again.

They say that the hardest lesson to learn is one that you had already mastered.

No matter where a person may be, communication is of utmost importance; for one to be heard and understood, and thoughts to be conveyed. But in the army the effectiveness of disseminating ideas is sadly of a higher priority than that of accurate and correct language- a typical dialogue is often times riddled with Singlish, dialects, or horrendous grammar, and even more so a combination of the aforementioned. We claim to be a civil and educated society. The army claims to have moved into the third generation. I don't really think so, in this respect.

Perhaps it won't be surprising for anyone to know that I am going to take up a course in Media and Communication after I leave the service. But with the standards of my command of language at this point in time, I would probably run into difficulties recalibrating myself to the near- perfect and impeccable language that the fresh high school leavers wield.

Much needs to be done yet...

Retro games! MUHAHAHA.

2009-11-01T10:37:00.002+08:00

01.11.2009
This has got to be a retro gamer's wet dream.

Yesterday I embarked on a quest to search for a DOS game that I played ages before- yes, by ages, I mean when I was still in primary school. Haha. After getting my hands on a copy, I realized that it came without sound, simply because XP is too new an environment for it to run properly.

In came the geek, and I tried to run it with DOSBOX. Voila~

And now, I am restoring another game that is Windows based but still is darn old- it was released in 1999. 10 years! My god. Apparently Disc 2 had took quite a bit of abuse, so I need to see if it's still working....

EDIT: It's ALLLLIIIVVVEE!! YAY!

Sometimes I think that I liked doing all these searching and troubleshooting more than the act of playing the said games. Does that make me a geek? Haha.

Ok so here's where my beer's hiding

2009-10-11T00:21:00.002+08:00

11.10.2009
On a hunch, I dragged myself to the ATM to check my account balance, and BOO YA! my pay was in.
And so I sauntered off to get a beer, and cash for the folks.

And tomorrow...
1. USB Mouse
2. Mousepad (duh)
3. Sandisk 2gb flash card
4. Bills
5. More beer

YAYS.

Oh my stupidity

2009-10-10T01:59:00.002+08:00

10.10.2009
Sometimes I just can't forgive my own stupidity. To think that I was crossed a few days ago when I was trying to play a video on this very netbook that I am typing on now because the dark scenes were- well, dark. It never occurred to me until just moments ago when I was playing with the display settings that I realized that I simply had set the brightness levels on the screen far too low. ARGH.

Incredible how stupid I could be..

Rants

2009-10-03T22:44:00.002+08:00

3.10.2009
It was a fun weekend, I'll say. Picked up my netbook, the Lenovo s10-2 (finally!) and did a botched job of applying the protectors to it. Argh.

Uninstalled the crapware that were on the system and got it a new look. :)

Now, after scouring the Net for information as pertaining to the creation of recovery media for the netbook for like 4 hours, I give up and post my question in a 3rd party forum.

Am now staring at the charging LED for it, hoping that it turns light blue soon.

Am quite amazed by the information (or lack, thereof) offered on the Lenovo site and the user manual. Ha.

Rants

2009-09-26T19:26:00.002+08:00

26.9.2009
Spent lots of cash and nearly got a nervous breakdown lately. Yesterday I was at camp on standby; there was some excitement over some find but luckily it didn't require our attention.

Other than the usual splurging on food, I find myself buying a Wii from Dylan's cousin. Well, I would either 1. disassemble it and see if I can build myself a WiiBox running Linux, or just softmod it to use homebrew. Haha.
The netbook that is on its way got it's protection today. I met up with this guy from an online netbook protector vendor and got a body, screen and keyboard protector set at $48. Not a bad deal, if you ask me. Apparently they offer some warranty of sorts too, for they got me( and a long list of others before me) to give them my email address, probably for verification. Haha.

So the pay check's only coming in 2 weeks from now, and I can virtually see myself surviving on instant noodles for these 14+ days. Ah, the ills of being a tech geek.

And as of this post, this blog had been with me through 200 posts. YAY to me.

Rants

2009-09-20T16:03:00.003+08:00

20.9.2009
Nicked and picked on the blog's template. Not working very well, since some of the buttons on the blog archives are missing.

Going to book out tomorrow for my medical appointment. The thing is it all seemed as a fallacy to me. If the orthopedics doctor that saw me told me that what I needed for my patella tenderitis to heal was rest.. then why this referral?

Missed out on the drinking session with the rest yesterday. Argh.

Excited about the netbook that I'm going to receive as a result of recontracting my broadband plan with Singnet, though it has a really small screen AND its specs aren't that impressive AND it probably needs some tweaks before it can work to my expectations (XD) AND it's not that new, being on the market for a while now, but what gives, it's free and it's MINE. MUHAHAHA.

Probably one thing that I have to complain about is facebook becoming nonsense. No wonder more and more people now prefers to use Twitter for their social networking. A typical FB wall feeds are now congested with auto- generated posts from FB games, which are bloody annoying.

Oh. Mum and Dad are kind enough to feed me for the past few days, and I'm grateful. :)

Rants

2009-09-18T12:09:00.002+08:00

18.9.2009
I finally muster the concentration and will to update my blog.
---
And after a month long dry spell with only several short drizzles, it rained. No, it would be better described as a downpour- and the rain had been going on for some 3 hours now, much to the irk of my mother.

I didn't care. It's been annoying how hot and humid the weather of late is, and yeah now it's wet and humid, but at least it isn't hot. For my room, at night the winds are static and it becomes a true roasting cabin. The fact that it's usually insect- infested didn't help too.

So I yearn for cool weather- and hopefully this rain would be a sign of the nice and breezy days to come. :)

2009-08-14T22:15:00.000+08:00

14.8.2009
It had been quite a slow week, with the exception of yesterday and tomorrow, where I am involved in some rote ops duties. Was grateful for getting the chance to recuperate.

Was thinking of something meaningful to write, but instead came up with little blank voids.

Maybe next time.

2009-08-09T19:39:00.000+08:00

9.8.2009
I so wanted to blog, but even blogger gave me a hiccup.
Right now, I'm typing into a field that is white, of which is surrounded by white, and clickables are showing up as hyperlinks and the font for the whole damn page is Times New Roman.

Could anyone tell me how damned a person could be?

2009-08-01T15:58:00.000+08:00

1.8.2009
越活，越感到生命的轻。

Rants

2009-07-14T00:21:00.002+08:00

14.3.2009
Just decided that I couldn't sleep. The cup of noodles that I just made for supper seemed to need a while to cook, and thus this blog post.

Too much had happened. H1N1, isolation, no isolation, drinking binge.

It seemed all too much like a pre-staged farce.

Bringing hun out for dinner tomorrow.

Anniversary celebrations= extended party~

2009-06-17T14:49:00.003+08:00

17.6.2009
Yesterday was like a party; an extended and fun party. At the dinner under the influence of booze everyone was high, the food was quite good, and the games...

ARGH. The games.

Ok. To put it in a nutshell there was a tie between 3 of the contestants that went through the first round, and so the winner had to be decided by other means.. and the emcees decided to let them do a 'sexy dance', and let the crowd decide which was the best and thus determine the winner.

It was a no- contest.

The winner did a little pole dance with the other contender as his pole, and before the actual dancing he did a little strip.. yeah, off with his blazer! The other 2 just stood and did nothing.

But..

THAT GUY WAS ME.

Haha. And lots of people are talking to me about it today... Damn. If anything, it did make me feel apprehensive about going back to work.... >.<
-------------------------------------------
After the anniversary dinner Ben, Roy, the Jasons, Jonathan and me wanted to go over to Arena, but it was holding a private party for those over the age of 29; Rebel was closed. In the end we went to YelloJello, where a live band was performing. After a while the band's lady singer invited us to the little floor area just before them to dance a little. Haha, imagine that: a live band performing for you as you dance! I have to admit; me being the block of immovable wood as I am it was quite fun.

Thanks dudes! And all the people I've toasted at the dinner(Jon and I toasted about 9 tables each?), it was great.

Rants

2009-06-13T08:03:00.002+08:00

13.6.2009
It's been ages since I blogged, and even as my PC was repaired I am blogging in camp- just something to keep me occupied as I am doing my duty in camp.

Went to Ma Maison's at Bugis with hun yesterday for dinner; honestly speaking I felt that the food wasn't fantastic and the service neither. If you ask me, I probably won't be going back for another meal, at least not anytime soon.

Even without the H1N1 issue it's always a recurring trend to see people falling sick at this time of the year. The symptoms are (terribly) similar to those that are suffering from the H1N1 virus too: fever, flu, sore throat, cough, and maybe some localised muscle aches here and there. Disturbing, if I may put it that way.

I now have a savings target; I hope to be able to save enough to get a netbook/phone come this July. Hopefully I would.

Bored.

2009-05-17T11:42:00.002+08:00

17.5.2009
It had been a fun weekend.
I had camp duties till Saturday morning, after which I met up with hun to go to Orchard Road to shop and walk around. She met this girl which she arranged to exchange a piece of apparel with. Call me paranoid, but that particular girl seems a little deranged. Weird.

And I would need to drag myself back to camp a little earlier today to prep whatever stores I may require for ops duties. Argh.

Checking out new phones, and renewing the hope that I may be able to save enough to buy myself one for my birthday. Yay. :)

Rants

2009-05-03T16:52:00.002+08:00

3.5.2009
Another weekend without much fun.
But for the first time in a long while, I am not looking forward to go back to work.

My aims for this month is as follows:
1. To save $300, so coupled with another month's savings I can buy a phone come August for my own birthday present. Yeah, I know my birthday's in July but what gives.
2. To have fast food only once a week
3. To have restaurant fare only once in the month.

Am happy that good games like Tekken 6 are coming to consoles, and especially on PSP. The thing is my PSP is quite the antique now, and I seriously don't know when it would give way. Never mind.

Hell, what else can I say apart from never mind?

Incessant speech irritates me. Bad use of grammar irritates me. Nonsensical concern over issues that have no bearing whatsoever on one's daily life irritates me.

Would I ever be comfortable enough not to let my mood swing, again, ever?

Rants

2009-05-01T21:14:00.002+08:00

1.5.2009
This blog is going to become a page full of one- liners if I don't start to blog properly. Ok, I am still not going to blog properly but what gives? It's my blog. :)

Today is Labour Day, and the platoon is on bloc leave yesterday for most of us so it means a long weekend; but my pay is like depleted so that makes it a damned long weekend.

Went to Orchard with hun, walked around, went to Chinatown for dessert, then went home after some walking to Tanjong Pagar. :)

Ok, I deliberately made the above abbreviated to demonstrate how painful it would be if I tried to put everything that hun and I saw into anyone's mind's eye. Plus, I am not precise with my choice of words so yes, I

NEED SOMETHING TO CAPTURE IMAGES WITH.

Which brings me back to the point that I would probably need a phone soon.

AND NOT THOSE THAT SOME ARMY GUY USES, BUT A RESPECTABLE ONE.

Ok, at least give me a cam- cording function along with that 5+++ megapixel camera.

Oh.
And probably that would be ages after my birthday. Damn it. Argh. Never mind, it's not like anyone reads this blog to look at the pictures anyway.

Hell, does anyone read this blog in the first place??

Oh well.

2009-04-30T14:32:00.000+08:00

30.4.2009
In EOD
I have colleagues
But no friends

Rants

2009-04-25T10:03:00.002+08:00

25.4.2009
Work piled on with lots of other external commitments make this week as much of a problem as the last.
Sort of disappointed that I cannot help Jon much.
Making a mental note to myself that I would be more conscientious.

Rants

2009-04-17T22:23:00.002+08:00

17.4.2009
The feeling surged yet again.
That I am out of rest; out of timeouts; out of whatever that makes me, me.
It's been 4 days and I get an accumulated rest period of less than 12 hours.
Something foul is brewing inside, and it is definitely unfair for anyone to see it.
So, if anyone notice this post, please. Let me slide, and I'll be grateful.

Rants

2009-04-12T11:06:00.002+08:00

12.4.2009
Pay's only released for like 2 days, and half is already gone. Good God.
I should really, really curb my freakish appetite.

Caught "Handsome Suit" with hun on Friday. It was a nice feel- good type of film with a big happy ending, but still manages to incorporate comical elements typical that of Japanese films. Not too serious, not too achy. Just right, with commercial elements making it a show easy to digest that everyone can enjoy.

Zen X-Fi proves to be a handful for hun to use, but ultimately firmware updates are going to makes things just fine(or so I think... :/).

A middle- aged biker dude zoomed past me whilst I was waiting for the green light to cross the road on the way home from camp today. I was just thinking maybe it's time to get rid of the angsty biker attitude, dude... or risk crushing his bag(or what's left in the bag) of bones.

Maybe I'll just forget about my birthday this year and then give myself a big belated present later in the year? We'll see how things goes. I can't say that I am not envious of those that have got rich friends, because they always(ALWAYS!!!)get the most outrageously big gifts. Hahaha. Speaking of all that, maybe it's time to compile my wishlist for the umpteen time in my life:

1. Netbook/Nokia E71/Samsung Pixon
2. My own bar. :) At least have a good assortment of drinks to play around with.
3. A pet dinosaur(no, not Barney the paedophilic dinosaur-- something like a walking Milo Dinosaur, perhaps?)
4. Something to kill off all the goddamn mosquitoes in the world, so when I sleep at home I won't wake up to bumps all over my goddamn, already- in- a- poor- condition skin.
5. A bigger Timbuk2 bag; the XL one. And maybe a laptop sleeve for it too, and I'll put a pizza box inside to simulate the lappy I'll eventually get maybe at year 2099.
6. A clone of hun, so as to satisfy my funny ideas of watching her sleep/eat/drink/poop at the same time.
7. A clone of myself, so that I could ask him why is he such a loser as to compile such a dumb wishlist that is never going to come to him. And simply why is he such a dumb asshat.
8. A gun. No, not Hydro-pump or whatever fancy names you give to water pistols-- maybe a Magnum.
9. An Every utility van with Hello Kitty emblazoned all over it. Yes, and give me those limited edition Hello Kitty rims too.
10. An ice cream cone as tall as Yao Ming.

Ooh. I'm getting excited just thinking about those. So excited, I'm actually sleepy. :)

2009-04-10T22:13:00.003+08:00

10.4.2009
I have to be strong for you, and just you.
I will.

Rants

2009-03-28T23:30:00.002+08:00

28.3.2009
Time flies. It's terribly cliched, but it's terribly true.
Without me actually noticing it's been more than a year since I enlisted. Looking at Meng, who just enlisted 2 weeks back, it's hard not to think that life is, well, not unlike flowing sand; through the slits of your fingers only to ebb into nothingness.

Work is ok, the pace is fine, everything is just like that. Fine. The hard times will come when I return to academics, and take up yet another part time job to tide me over the times when I need the allowance. Time spent doing nothing would be a precious rarity. But it would be just an issue that needs getting used to, all over again.

I realize. I am very fortunate to have people by me. I am fortunate to have Apple by me. I am, that darn lucky, to have friends that care.

How many individuals would take the time to stop whatever they may be doing, take a step back and look at how blessed they are?
Humans. Sigh.

Rants

2009-03-21T23:20:00.002+08:00

21.3.2009
All the guys in the platoon had a long week.
I'm lucky, just pure lucky, to have a nice weekend.
Thank you. :)

Next week is going to be busy too, probably.
I could only hope for the weekend duties to not touch Saturday, which is probably the case but still, I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

And I realized today that I made a mistake with some dates, which for the first time is an error that I am glad that I have made. :
----------------
I thought I wanted to blog on today, but I realized that I lost all momentum.
Perhaps Facebook would provide some trails on my whereabouts.
:)

痛

2009-03-17T20:07:00.002+08:00

17.3.2009
下午工作完毕，回到裕廊。
和筱萍买了一对戒指，我很喜欢；戒指就戴在无名指上。

然后，迟些时候，有个她告诉我：她并不相信我的为人。
当然。我从不胆敢要人说我是个好好先生。
我的行迹似乎很模糊。事情有时交待得不清不楚。总是疯疯癫癫的。快二十岁了的人，竟还如此吊儿郎当。
我都认了。
可我却还发现，我原来如此惹人讨厌；只怕受厌恶的程度不浅。
心情，蒙上了一层灰色，夹杂着一点蓝色。
仿佛是云。却缓缓的，天朝我压了下来。
窒息中，无奈的味道压盖过了胸腔里爆发的血腥。。。

Rants

2009-03-13T22:31:00.002+08:00

13.3.2009
This was a terribly slow week. Trainings isn't exactly rigorous, but still manages to sap me of my energy, not unlike blood draining out from a bloody carcass from a deep and long gash that came from nowhere.

Next week would be a busy week, I presume, and rightfully so. It's high time for me to pick up the pace again and really WORK.

Love. It makes people do the strangest things.

2009-03-08T00:02:00.002+08:00

8.3.2008
The PC is far too ancient to competently run Left 4 Dead. Argh.
Booking back into camp tomorrow, and am not looking forward to it.
For a while, hey, I thought I was a civilian again.
Sigh.

2009-03-05T11:23:00.000+08:00

5.3.2009
Have got lots of things to prepare for ops next week.
Feeling strangely apprehensive about returning back to work.

Upset

2009-03-03T13:29:00.002+08:00

3.3.2009
For the entire week I would be at home, since I am on bloc leave.
It's disturbing how boring the past few hours had been, and having alcohol on hand did not make things better.
And my cellphone which manages to delay texts at several hours at once is getting on my nerves.
Upset.

Rants

2009-02-28T21:09:00.004+08:00

28.2.2009
Tired.
Tomorrow I would be at the ACE, at Ngee Ann City. And after that I would be booking into camp straight. Haha. Hopefully everything would be well.

In the unlikely event where someone is concerned about my relationship status, yes, I am attached now, to Miss Apple Lee Yinzhen. Finally, someone dares to acknowledge this mess of a person as her boyfriend. I am grateful. :)

Perhaps I would clear my offs during the next few days? And get some more sleep.

Running very low on budget. Argh.

Rants

2009-02-28T00:29:00.002+08:00

28.2.2009
My working schedule should be accurately described as hectic lately.
Running from one camp to another, preparing training aids...
It left me half dead.
I wish to clear whatever off days I have next week, just to get more sleep at home.

Solved the Soma's Snake puzzle finally, by following an online video guide.

Drinking lots of tea.

Still suffers from insomnia, only not as frequent.

2009-02-25T00:00:00.000+08:00

25.2.2009
突然想抽烟。

Thank you... :)

2009-02-23T21:22:00.000+08:00

23.2.2009
Thank god I've still got you Apple.

I think..

2009-02-23T19:06:00.002+08:00

23.2.2009
... that I am happier now then say a month ago. :)

Am at home now. Took a half day off and Apple came up to my place. Cape No. 7 was faulty..!!! >.< The dvd apparently skipped audio portions. I'm sorry...

Would be going to Seletar Camp tomorrow, to Training Centre. Work, then probably go back to camp straight. Haha.

Just had dinner, which comprised of stir fried fish in sweet and sour sauce and rice, and a bowl of instant noodles.

Oh. And it's ages since I was last caught in a heavy rain not unlike a torrential downpour. Darn it everything apart from the stuff I stowed safely inside my Timbuk2 was wet.

Looking forward to end the week already. Groans.

Rants

2009-02-22T14:55:00.002+08:00

22.2.2009
God, it's been a while since I blogged.

But after sitting myself down by the PC I find that I have little to blog about, or I do not wish to share.

And thus, suffice to say that I am alive and well, to all those that bothers to read this little cobweb- infested weblog.

:)

2009-02-07T01:00:00.001+08:00

7.2.2009
Dinner was just all right.

Dessert at Raffles's Creamery was okay.

The trip home myself was terrible.

Rants

2009-02-05T18:14:00.002+08:00

5.2.2009
Just a little less than a month to my 1st year in national service.

Tomorrow the unit's having dinner at Ah Yat's Seafood, at Shaw Towers just off Beach Road. The food is, well, quite frankly, good. It shouldn't be considered a coincidence that the platoon only had Dim Sum for lunch there today. 10 was at the table, and for less than $20 each we had a hearty meal. Yum. :)

And, a little wishlist.
1. Some shirts;
2. Some shoes;
3. A new portable hard drive(groan);
4. A fresh pair of slippers;
5. A laptop.

Argh. The laptop is the actual problem here. Even if somehow I managed to scrape together just enough moolahs to buy one, would I still stay loyal to Windows, or simply jump out of one hell into another by adopting Leopard, on Mac systems?

To end off, Mum and Dad, if you are reading this, could you stop turning the goddamn air conditioner's compressor unit off, please? Sigh.

2009-02-01T16:17:00.000+08:00

1.2.2009
空空的。

Rants

2009-01-30T20:50:00.002+08:00

31.1.2009
It's a Friday, and still I've got to work tomorrow. Ah. The ails of being in CBRE.

寻寻觅觅
冷冷清清
凄凄惨惨
戚戚。。

Have got to start saving up now, for my Poly tuition fees in the near future.

最近很喜欢的一首歌- 《夜夜夜夜》。
想问天你在那里
我想问问我自己
一开始我聪明结束我聪明
聪明的几乎的毁掉了我自己
想问天问大地
或著是迷信问问宿命
放弃所有抛下所有
让我飘流在安静的夜夜空里
你也不必牵强再说爱我
反正我的灵魂已片片凋落
慢慢的拼凑慢慢的拼凑
拼凑成一个完全不属於真正的我
你也不必牵强再说爱我
反正我的灵魂已片片凋落
慢慢的拼凑慢慢的拼凑
拼凑成一个完全不属於真正的我
(music)
想问天问大地
或著是迷信问问宿命
放弃所有抛下所有
让我飘流在安静的夜夜空里
你也不必牵强再说爱我
反正我的灵魂已片片凋落
慢慢的拼凑慢慢的拼凑
拼凑成一个完全不属於真正的我
你也不必牵强再说爱我
反正我的灵魂已片片凋落
慢慢的拼凑慢慢的拼凑
拼凑成一个完全不属於真正的我
你也不必牵强再说爱我
反正我的灵魂已片片凋落
慢慢的拼凑慢慢的拼凑
拼凑成一个完全不属於真正的我
我不愿再放纵
我不愿每天每夜每秒飘流
也不愿再多问再多说再多求我的梦
我不愿再放纵
我不愿每天每夜每秒飘流
也不愿再多问再多说再多求
我的梦

无题

2009-01-26T01:54:00.002+08:00

26.1.2009
已经是午夜时分。还不太想睡。
心里很感动。
谢谢你咯。

一年接一年，农历新年似乎越来越少了那份这个华人传统节日该有的气氛了。
今年，终于，守睡过了凌晨十二点，没有听见人们的互相道贺，没有非法燃放的鞭炮声，更没有一丝期盼。
农历年，不是农历年了。

Ipod 生病了，病得似乎很严重。
唉。

我想，种种的种种，只说明了我这个人有多犯贱。

哈哈。

:)

2009-01-24T18:04:00.002+08:00

24.1.2009
Sometime through blogging I wonder if anyone actually cares about whatever I am posting up here. But my concern is that no one SHOULD. It should be noted that whatever I choose to post here should be taken as inane speech and that only..

The week was eventful. Marcus's grandmother passed away during mid- week, Benjamin had an interesting (ahem) activation and the Mess initiation left me aching all over. I shan't go into the specifics, but those that were involved in the above- mentioned events have me handing a knowing nod and maybe a smile to them.

Tomorrow is Chinese New Year's Eve. Note that I refuse to use it's popular abbreviation "CNY." To me it's horrible. Did anyone notice how Kentucky's Fried Chicken became KFC slowly over the years? It somehow conjures an image of unhealthy fowl with abnormal muscular growth that are fed with feed that is laced with too much chemicals. It's terrible. In the same breath, I would hate to see CNY become something that is nothing more than just another public holiday.

Enough said, and a very happy Chinese New Year to everyone that knows me, or rather deserves me knowing. Cheers.

Horrendous week

2009-01-17T13:44:00.002+08:00

17.01.2009
It was a terrible week.
Time past not unlike a torrential downpour- fast, and furious.
Then it was yesterday.
Upon booking out from camp I asked Cheng Ai out for dinner.
In the end it was Subway, at Marina Square.
He said something that quite jarred me, but I forgot.
Today, I think I will drag my battered self out to buy some groceries and cut my darn hair.
And tomorrow, I've got to book back into camp in the morning because I've got operations duties.
Sigh.

Rants

2009-01-11T11:49:00.002+08:00

11.1.2009
On my way home from the ATM earlier, I saw discarded toys near the garbage bin just by the lifts.
Seeing those stirs a certain emotion within me; it isn't as explicit as sadness, but not as mild as displeasure.

I recall. As a child I have little toys, and more often than not I take comfort in reading and rereading what limited materials I have. There was once, I remembered being exuberant at having picked up some unwanted toys when the family was still living in Bukit Batok. Alas, my joy was short- lived, for my father demanded that I discarded them all on the accusation that they were dirty, despite me remembering that I wiped them, albeit carelessly. My father's words then were not to be defied, and somehow saltwater made their way onto my tongue as I placed the toys, one by one, into the refuse chute. My father could not be bothered, as I recalled.
Perhaps, that was the reason why I buy soft toys now that I am an adult. I have no idea if this is me taking a vengeance upon my childhood.
I, have no idea whether this incident dictated that I would become the mess that I am today.

Being rebellious is one phase of life that everyone had went through. Mine came in the form of getting 2 piercings on my left earlobe when my family was vehemently, violently against that. I reeled up wearing a stock cap whenever I was in the family, till the point that they realized that they would do no good trying to exert control over me as they had did when I was younger.

Fast forward to present.

I just proved myself to be a jerk when I simultaneously pissed off 2 separate persons just by the power of SMS alone. And to add to my claim I am not in the least bit apologetic. Yes, I was when I was slightly intoxicated yesterday, but on retrospect those weren't exactly my fault. Just somehow, my good intentions were often met with less- than- desirable results and like yesterday, hostility.
What am I supposed to say.

No, dammit. I just keep to myself, and refrain from venturing out of my room and everything would be so goddamn fine.

Haha.

For myself

2009-01-10T19:50:00.002+08:00

10.1.2009
Dinner was an 80 grams pack of M&Ms.
Would be catching a movie with the gang later.

If it's not meant to be, it would be ultimately futile to even try.

Time for me to wake up and start living.

For myself.

Rants

2009-01-09T22:21:00.003+08:00

9.1.2009
Had a platoon's initiating dinner at Holiday Inn the Atrium. The restaurant we visited was Melting Pot, and true to skeptic ideas from Lt. Eugene the food was indeed not up to my initial expectations. Not that I have my usual fine appetite to start with, though.

The rest are probably going places after that, and I here I am at home. Is it that I am alone, or that I should try being less anti- social?

Mob- manning for my unit falls on this week, and I am expecting it to come say tomorrow.

Am watching 超级星光大道 on Youtube, and a particular challenging contestant sang the song 爱如潮水. Sky Wu's comment amused me quite a bit.
"你是要传达心碎,还是要传达对于被抛弃,被人家劈腿的一种愤怒?"
Reflecting upon this yields some interesting issues for me to ponder.
----------------------------------------------------
If all goes well, tomorrow night would be movies with the gang; I would wager that they, being the bloodthirsty lot that they are they would go for Ong Bak 2. Not that I dislike the action; there is poetry in violence. XD

What would the year hold for me? I'm dyingto find out.

Ha.

Upset

2009-01-04T18:41:00.002+08:00

4.1.2009
Dinner took me 12 minutes.

I am upset.

Everyone apart from myself is late, and no one ever shows the slightest signs of being apologetic.

Which I can understand why.

Thanks Grace

2009-01-04T16:40:00.001+08:00

4.1.2009
She made me a new blogskin.. :)
I am very grateful..
Thank you.

Work, rants, friends, a hotch potch of mess

2009-01-04T02:56:00.002+08:00

4.1.2009
It's now 2.56am as I struggle to record as sanely as possible what had happened to me during the past 4 hours.

Grace had a problem with her laptop and I was trying to help solve her problem by providing remote assistance, but I failed miserably and her mum issued her an order for her to hang up, and so she did and the problem... I didn't know it resolved or not, and as my consciousness slowly slips away I am sure this would haunt me in my dreams. As a precautionary measure, I asked Ray to procure a laptop for temporary use lest Grace's laptop give way. Thanks a bunch again my man.

But Ray has his problems as well, as he was trying to make a homebrewed video program run on his psp. I troubleshooted that with good results whilst I was providing whatever little help I could channel to Grace, and at the same time..

...talking to my superior. Well, we used to be course- mates but now Justin, or rather 2nd Lieutenant Justin, is going to be my platoon's 2IC and we talked at certain length about the training direction of the platoon. It certainly was insightful. Haha.

My brain's all gone already, so let me daze myself out for just another minute before I surrender to my human limit...

无趣。犯贱。

2009-01-03T08:06:00.003+08:00

3.1.2009
执行任务。
无趣。
-----------------------------------------
望著你　突然一陣心痛
一次又一次任那感情放縱
你的脆弱　讓我走不開
你的依賴　所以我存在

想著你　還是想到心痛
期待我做的將來你都會懂
有一天　真如果我有一天
但願我還在你記憶中

不问你为何流眼泪不在乎你心里还有谁
请让我给你安慰不论结局是喜是悲

我再也不愿见你在深夜里买醉
不愿别的男人见识你的抚媚
你该知道这样会让我心碎
答应我你从此不在深夜里徘徊
不要轻易尝试放纵的滋味
你可知道这样会让我心碎

哈哈，犯贱。
-----------------------------------------
感冒了。

The end of the weird day

2009-01-03T00:38:00.002+08:00

3.1.2009
都说好的不灵坏的灵。
今天一整天都和巧玲在一起，发生了一些有趣的事、不太愉快的事、奇怪的事。
可是却让我更了解她一点。
Show me, exactly, how deep the rabbit hole is.
故事的发展，算我一份吧。太多事的我总忍不住想看事情是如何结尾的。
怪异的一天，就此结束。

第一帖

2009-01-01T03:40:00.003+08:00

1.1.2009
新的一年的第一则帖。
刚从俊辉家徒步回来，路程并不太长，花了我大概20分钟之久。
可我一个人踏在这短短的旅程上的步伐却有些沉，有些踌躇，有些无奈。
人，都是怕寂寞的动物吧。。

大家都有过节的心情，气氛热闹，可众人皆醉我独醒。
小朋友很可爱。呵呵。
原先说的暖炉，结果变成了是一些米粉佐上炸物，还有一台迷你的巧克力火锅、蒟若作为甜点。虽然心里有些许失望，但俊辉的家里人实在大方客气，招待我们十分周全，我也没什么能怨的了。
饭后和陈琰到俊辉家楼下，他把近来发生在他身上的一些事对我娓娓而谈。
他们的世界，我疏得太远了。

新的一年，我不敢再有什么憧憬。
就让它消逝而终，就像往年一般吧。

NYE

2008-12-31T15:39:00.001+08:00

31.12.2008
It's the end of 2008.
I would be going to Junhui's place for steamboat later, probably.
Happy new year everyone.

Rants

2008-12-27T14:22:00.002+08:00

26.12.2008
364 days earlier, I shutted down andre0407.
It is perhaps never meant to be mine.

Yesterday Kaiwen commented on my blog, that she thought that it was pretty funny that someone would try to tell the world exactly how happy he is on his blog.
I smiled and shook my head a little. No.
Ever wondered why there's this thing about being as truthful as possible, at least to yourself?
I think it's because when you can tell yourself a lie for a thousand times, you suddenly becomes convinced that it really is the truth.
It is perhaps never meant to be mine.

It never dawn upon me how wrong I always am until circumstances took a plunge for the worst and ugly could not suffice to describe matters anymore.
And I was never sensitive enough to see what brews under the surface of matters.
And thus my new year resolution, no. 1.
To be a better man.
Granted, the above spans so wide that all my other resolutions would come under it, but perhaps the specifics behind it is better left to me and me alone, that I would be spared from the probing eyes of everyone I know and love that I am such an abhorrent monster.
It is perhaps never meant to be mine.

No.2.
Be thrifty.
No.3.
Be more task- oriented.
No.4.
Quit whining.
No.5.
Earn and give due respect.
No.6.
Be happy.
Darn it, it is never meant to be mine.

Where had that goddamn feeling went..?
I am cursed.
Hell, happiness... never meant to be mine..

Slow day

2008-12-26T21:43:00.003+08:00

26.12.2008
As above.

In the afternoon I met Kaiwen at Jurong Point and we had lunch at KFC, and then we proceeded to walk around the new extended wing of the mall... and I have to say that though it was huge, I was not thrilled by the new lineup of shops in the mall.

And Kaiwen indicated that she hadn't seen anyone get a piercing on their ear before, and thus I offered to use my right earlobe for the demonstration. Haha. I had thought about getting it for quite some time now, and am happy to finally find the right time and mood to get it done.

Thereafter was dessert at Bugis. Haha. I was surprised it was the first time Kaiwen tasted 杨枝甘露. I ordered 西瓜西米露but I suspect it wasn't fresh... I had a bad case of tummy ache after eating it. Haha.

After that we got Ting Zhou to watch Ip- Man at Bugis. Yes, I know, I saw the show already but Ting Zhou hadn't, and Kaiwen and I don't mind catching it again.

And ends with me ending off this post so that Grace(Lee. Haha) can peruse it. :)

Bored. Empty.

Belated Xmas to everyone

2008-12-26T01:25:00.002+08:00

26.12.2008
The time now is 1.25am in the morning, and I just realized that I had forgotten to wish most of the people I know to have a good Christmas. Here is is, albeit late.

Not much had happened; on the eve of Christmas I found myself in White Bar with Wee, Kai Wen, Meng, Ting Zhou and Grace Neo(argh, the pain of mentioning people with the same names whilst blogging). We reeled up finishing a bottle of Martell and 6 bottles of beer. Ha. I ended up nearly losing my consciousness when we decided that it was getting late and Wee suggested playing poker, 5 card stud style, to determine who would be the unlikely chump. We raised and called by means of adding liquor and mixers into 5 cups, and it just so happened that Lady Luck wasn't smiling at me. My hand was terrible, no pairs or whatnot, and my highest card was a seven. Haha.

On Christmas I spent the afternoon waiting for Ting Zhou, then went to Sun Plaza with him to get some games for his newly bought PSP because there is no hacks available for the motherboard in question at the moment. I am sorry for bursting his bubble, and I feel strangely guilty(again) for something that I probably had no rein over..

In the evening I went to Grand Copthorne Waterfront Hotel to see the final caroling slot that Wild Empire is holding and it was good~ Thereafter I saw Grace Lee(argh, the strange but necessary way to differentiate people..)back home and voila, back at home and doing nothing essential but still am motivated enough to blog.

Kbox session in January, anyone... >.<
Later in the afternoon, if all goes well I should be meeting Kaiwen for lunch.

Rants

2008-12-20T21:28:00.002+08:00

20.12.2008
1 year and 7 days before I shutted down andre0407.
Such a nostalgic feeling that blog gives me.

The man I was, the man I am, the man that I would inevitably become.
---------------------------------------------
Am still feeling quite sickly, and therefore had to turn down Raymond and Tom to go for a few drinks.
Sorry guys. I promise to recover and make time for you guys next week.
And I'm also apologetic for the Wee and gang, because yesterday I was supposed to have turned up for dinner with them at Sakae Sushi at Sengkang, then catch the movie , then go drinking with them at Wee's place.
Sigh.

And, on the matter of correct pronounciation, is not "I-p Man", which simply means he is not that guy that your internet service provider employed to do whatnot on your computer, network connection or whatsoever.

Ip Man is Cantonese for 叶问, a Chinese martial arts expert in Wing- Chun; 咏春, a punching style. He was revered as a teacher, and perhaps the most prominent student he eventually nurtured was the legendary Bruce Lee.
----------------------------------------------
For the next week, I would be only working for effectively 2 days.
Haha. On Christmas Eve, members of the battalion would be having lunch at Vivocity, and after which I would have the day off... and since I am not on festive duties(lucky me!) I would not have to report back to camp on Thursday and I already applied for leave on Friday~ :)
----------------------------------------------
Have the craving for basketball... sigh...
----------------------------------------------

想起我不完美
你会不会
逃离我生命的范围
想着你的滋味
我会不会
把这个枕头
变得甜美

想起白天的约会
忘了晚上的咖啡
只怕感情如潮水
远离我梦中的堡垒

一个人失眠
全世界失眠
无辜的街灯
守候明天
幸福的失眠
只是因为害怕闭上眼
如何想你想到六点
如何爱你爱到终点

一个人失眠
全世界失眠
幸福的失眠
只是因为害怕闭上眼
如何想你想到六点
如何爱你爱到终点
如何爱你爱到终点

想起我的时候
你会不会
好像我一样
不能睡
想像你的暧昧
我会不会
数不到绵羊
一双一对

重点是我怕我的失眠会害你不眠。就此而以。呵呵。

殇

2008-12-19T00:45:00.002+08:00

19.12.2008
并非我胡思乱想，而是我无从考究，只好采取最保守的态度示人。。。
纵使我的数学再好，倘若一道习题没有加减乘除，我仍是无法解题的，对吧。
现在，我只能说我很困扰。
我真的，真的没有读心的特异功能；我，猜不透。

如果你要的是纯友谊，请和我说。
如果你能考虑和我发展，请和我说。
如果你要我等你能定心，请和我说。
如果你要的是一个唯有在你有空时才会找来陪你的人，请和我说。
如果你需要男佣，请和我说。

总的来说，我真的，真的没有赌注猜了。
这不是一场游戏，可是却得押上真心。好难。
规则不是我定的，庄家更不是我；我甚至不知道自己每一盘是在赢抑或在输，因为庄家坚持不肯透漏丁点规则，连我的状况都守口如瓶。

Tell me, please?
Please?

Happy birthday to Grace

2008-12-19T00:09:00.001+08:00

19.12.2008
As above.
:)

Sick

2008-12-18T20:29:00.002+08:00

18.12.2008
I'm back home today.
Damn my flu; it took a turn for the worst when I slept less than 3 hours from yesterday till dawn this morning.
I fear it may develop into a fever.
But I still got to work. Have got some paperwork on my hands that I need to finish before the cut-off tomorrow.

And to top it all off, my mood's badly overcast.
-------------------------------------------
3.5 hours to Grace's birthday. :)
-------------------------------------------
Back to work.

Back to work

2008-12-14T20:41:00.002+08:00

14.12.2008
It's been a wonderful week.
Thank you Grace. :)

Alas, still it comes, the day that I need to return to camp.
Feeling unpleasant resistance to the army well up again.
Hmph.

It's going to be busy, so it means even less time for friends.
And for people like Ting Zhou and Wee, who are serving in normal units, I don't think they would get to see in anytime soon at all.

Sigh.

Too bad.

Back to reality.

Good morning

2008-12-13T07:22:00.002+08:00

13.12.2008
It is now 7.22am in the morning.
Just returned from a pubbing session with Cheng Ai and Raymond.

Despite having to wait for them to finally appear(I stood for almost 1 hour waiting for Cheng Ai at the Popular bookstore's entrance at Jurong East), I would say that they are always worth my time.
I went with a heavy heart, only to find it lightened quite a bit, thanks to them.

3 guys with a bottle of Martell. Never fails to conjure senseless humour and frankly, a idiotically fun time.

And I just recalled that Cheng Ai has a new English name: Tom.
Don't ask me why he decided to call himself by this name, nor ask me for Jerry. I could not and would not furnish anyone with any reasonable explanation to this, for I am baffled by his taste and choice of name in the same bubble of thought.
And thus, the liquor that we could not manage to finish because Tom was on a dead high, was labelled with the names,"Raymond, Dennis and Tom."
Haha.

After that we adjourned to MacDonalds' near Bugis Street after walking about for some distance. Yes, we walked from Boat Quay to Bugis just because we felt that it was far too early to go home.
And Ray, even if he needed to be in school today he still am game to stick with us for the entire night, just because we asked.
Perhaps this would illustrate the difference between guys and girls that girls would rarely attend to such whimsical behaviour of the boys, for it is not logically coherent. Whoever said that guys are always more logical aren't necessarily true in this aspect, it would seem...

Oh. And before I forget, many thanks and apologies to you.I appreciate you spending time to text me when I am bored waiting for things to happen, and even am sweet enough to give me a call when you are about to sleep(which I suspect you already did, but still picked yourself up to call me. At least, that's wishful thinking on my part to satisfy my vanity). I am content. :)

And there. 2 days of skipping my resting hours and I finally am going to have a good sleep. Good morning everyone.

Visit

2008-12-12T10:46:00.002+08:00

12.12.2008
Had a most pleasant visit at Grace's place yesterday.
I'm sorry, Grace.
Returned home and fall asleep straight afterwards.

:)

2008-12-11T12:45:00.002+08:00

11.12.2008
Yesterday was interesting.
Went to Parkway Parade to watch Grace's choir carol. It was fine, all fine, but the other members claim that they could see exactly what they felt is wrong, real- time feedback style, from my facial expression alone. Haha.

Thereafter Grace was kind enough to invite me for dinner along with the other members of Wild Empire, at Pastamania. Truth be told, I dislike Pastamania, because I feel that it's simply... unappetizing. In spite of that I sat down and worked my way through a plate of Meatball Fettucini which is supposed to be coated in bolognaise but did not taste like that any one bit. Argh.

The meal was... well, if it permits I'll call it rubbish, but the conversations that were going on concurrently was interesting. Well, they are just like any group of young people that trash- talks.. I couldn't expect anyone to behave like I do, could I..? Haha.

After that the party took our respective transports home, and being duty and honour bound I sent Grace back home before going home on the LRT. Oh yes, and I took the LRT simply because I would not have caught the last bus at that hour.. and even when I transferred onto the North East line and then the East West line back I realized that it was the last train for the day already. Haha. At this juncture I've got to say that the LRT platform was horrible as it is, and even the more irksome when it's late. It was horribly eerie, which luckily was dispelled by Grace's call to me.

And Grace.. I appreciate you calling to accompany me back home. A lot. Thank you.. but being too headstrong isn't going to be always workable in the long run, if you get my drift... right. :)

Oh yes. And later in the evening I would be visiting Grace at her place. I could only say that I'm happy and excited. Hee. It's not everyday that I get to go to someone else's place just to visit. Haha.

Would update on this later.. :)

《海角七号》

2008-12-09T23:20:00.003+08:00

9.12.2008
和正毅和敬庭看了《海角七号》。
剧终，我只能说我很感动。

故事其实很难描述。
这里，我采用了这出电影的官方网站上的故事大纲：点击这里进入。

“跨越六十年的七封情書追尋一輩子的音樂夢想”

六十多年前，台灣光復，日本人撤離。一名日籍男老師隻身搭上了離開台灣的船隻，也離開了他在台灣的戀人：友子。無法當面說出對友子的感情，因此，他把懷念與愛戀化成字句，寫在一張張的信紙上。

六十多年後，台灣的樣貌早已完全改變，各個角落的人為生活而努力，幾個活在不同角落的小人物各自懷抱音樂夢想：失意樂團主唱阿嘉、只會彈月琴的老郵差茂伯、在修車行當黑手的水蛙、唱詩班鋼琴伴奏大大、小米酒製造商馬拉桑、以及交通警察勞馬父子，這幾個不相干的人，竟然要為了度假中心演唱會而組成樂團，並在三天後表演，這點讓日本來的活動公關友子大為不爽，對這份工作失望透頂，每天頂著臭臉的友子也讓待過樂團的阿嘉更加不高興，整個樂團還沒開始練習就已經分崩離析……。

老郵差茂伯摔斷了腿，於是將送信大任交阿嘉手上，不過阿嘉每天除了把信堆在自己房裡外，什麼都沒做，他在郵件堆中找到了一個來自日本，寫著日據時代舊址「恆春郡海角七番地」的郵包，他好奇打開郵包，發現裡面的信件都是日文寫的，根本看不懂，因此不以為意的他，又將郵包丟到床底下，假裝什麼事都沒發生。

演出的日期慢慢接近，這群小人物發現，這可能是他們這輩子唯一可以上台實現他們音樂夢想的時刻，每個人開始著手練習，問題是阿嘉跟友子之間的火藥味似乎越來越重，也連帶影響樂團的進度。終於，在一場鎮上的婚宴，大家借著酒後吐真言，原來阿嘉跟友子兩人都是孤獨的異鄉人，解開心結的兩人發現了怒氣下所隱藏的情愫，於是發展出了一夜情。

在阿嘉的房裡，友子看到了日本來的郵包，發現那居然是來自六十年前七封未及寄出的情書，她要阿嘉務必要把郵包送到主人手上，然而，日本歌手要來了、郵包上的地址早就不存在、第二首表演樂曲根本還沒著落、而貝斯手茂伯依然不會彈貝斯……。

而友子，在演唱會結束後，也要隨著歌手返回日本，開始新的生活。
阿嘉終於決定打起精神，重整樂團，他們的音樂夢是否能夠實現？沉睡了六十年的情書是否會安然送到信件的主人「友子」手中？而阿嘉跟友子的戀情，是否能夠繼續發展下去？……

人只能活一回，夢想卻有無數個，唯有放手一搏，才能知道機會屬不屬於自己……。

对我来说，这部电影很真实，很生活化，所以不难相信。
故事的发展是一节一节的，从不同人的角度去看自己的生活，然后借由演唱会和迟到六十余年的邮包，慢慢的串联在一起。
所以，倘若光看故事大纲，故事情节是不太符合逻辑的：可是因为这出戏快下档了，有兴趣的朋友还是等DVD上架了之后再去找找吧。呵呵。
好，把话题带回故事上。
剧中有蛮多情节让我留下印象，让我慢慢说。。
1. 《海》里的许多对白都是用闽南语，让我觉得满亲切的。。。虽然我并不是台湾人。呵呵。
2. 范逸臣（阿嘉）在剧初摔吉他的那一幕。有性格，但也可见其无奈。
3. 麦子（大大）在电梯里唱的无厘头的圣歌。
4. 范逸臣和田中千绘(友子）的床戏。
5. 中孝介和田中千绘在车上的对白。
6. 范逸臣把包裹轻轻放到老奶奶的凳子上然后逃走的一幕。
7. 范逸臣在沙滩上对田中千绘拥抱时说的一番话。很感动。
8. 演唱会时镜头拉到幕旁的田中千绘身上，然后范逸臣对着荧幕上的她的一幕。

有笑料，有感动，有激情，亲情，爱情。《海》完全出乎我的意料。拍摄的手法可能对某些人来说会有点粗糙，但这正是这部电影可贵的地方：平民化，不太奢华。
好棒。

“你，看见彩虹了吗。。？”

Dying

2008-12-07T22:19:00.002+08:00

7.12.2008
It's that same old feeling again.

My calves burn and my lungs threaten to burst. It's dark and I trying to escape, despite knowing that it would be inevitably futuile.

I shouldn't express discontent.

It engulfs me. I don't feel any pain- it never is actually physically incapacitating. I flail, trying hard to grasp dimensionality.

Is yet everything just a shard out of my imagination?

I landed with a dull thud... but I could not possibly navigate without light upon
the black.

I cannot say that I am a void..

There is no response when I yell, for my cries are confined to my throat.

For emptiness fills me.

I despair. Pieces of me are already part of the black. I swallowed the saltwater and braced myself for the finale.

Still I am puzzled.
Am I dying,
or am I already dead?

Blues

2008-12-07T10:51:00.002+08:00

7.12.2008
Meeting Benjamin, Jason Liew and Nicholas later for Kbox.
Normally I would be hyper by now, hopping around and very happy that I could go.
Now...
it just seemed like it's just another gathering.
Not the fault with the guys...
It's just me.

Wash my clothes
Prepare my breakfast
Watch the TV
Read a book
Arrange my room
All alone.

Whoever says that you can't have Sunday blues....

Spent

2008-12-06T15:03:00.002+08:00

6.12.2008
Came back from ops duties.
Am 30 dollars poorer owing to the exorbitantly priced cab fare from home to Selarang in the wee hours before dawn.
Haha. I should say it's all taken into consideration and it's all okay.

Someone messaged me on OKC. Haha. Not that anyone will care.

I'm not making sense now and am seeing double.
I shall pass into slumber in exactly 4 minutes.

Artificial Insomniac

2008-12-06T02:52:00.002+08:00

6.12.2008
Staying up tonight.
Got to go to work tomorrow morning.
Ops duty.
Haha.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Had dinner with Cheng Ai and Raymond at Anchor Point, at Queensway. Dinner comprised of Fish and Chips, along with iced鸳鸯 and some 锅贴and 烧买. :) This was a treat for myself, in compensation for the horrible lunch at camp.
During dinner Grace commented that she's getting used to seeing me every Friday; being the person that I am I went to her place and had a chat with her.

Poor thing, being that worn- out but her stubborn nature simply won't give way and, even if she vehemently denies it... it is torturous for her to still want to entertain me.

Went home after meeting her, chatted a little over MSN, played some games that I've never played before and being accused of being a noob(oh yes, this was no accusation, I AM one. Haha), and finally talked a little on the phone before she decides that it's time to hit slumberland.

I am thankful.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
The mind provides the answer.
The eyes peruse the clues.
The ears spy on undertones.
The mouth responds tentatively.

The heart, shouts out against everything.

And perhaps, this is the conflicting truth.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Artificial insomnia induced.
Resting again in 12 hours time.
Terrible.

Ah.

2008-11-30T11:57:00.001+08:00

30.11.2008
To fall or not to fall, or fallen...
That is the question...

Lost

2008-11-30T00:29:00.002+08:00

29.11.2008
I am thrown into a sea of emotions.
Amid all the confusion
I saw a buoy
Alas. I was not the only soul lost upon these choppy waters.
Would it save me?
And deliver me to the far banks of solace and bliss?
Or would it sink me?
And never would I surface, only to die at the seabed
While my being would be broken, assimilated
And become another fragment of a vague memory..?

I am lost, upon this sea of sorrow and heartache...

一腔话

2008-11-23T17:15:00.002+08:00

23.11.2008
今天一整天都没有饿过肚子。
一大早便到大巴窑和大伙儿吃点心，一笼接一笼的虾饺、腐皮卷、叉烧包、肠粉。。。吃得满足。：）
唯一美中不足的便是某位梁姓小姐的赖床习惯导致众人迟到（呵呵），所幸没有延误了中午和巧玲的饭局。

从大巴窑乘坐地铁回到裕廊东，接巧玲到坐落于克拉码头的The Central,然后在 Kyomomoyama （桃金山）解决了午饭。
和她在吃饭时说得不多。
饭后巧玲提议到Starbucks坐坐，我们各点了杯Frappucino.
然后，我又没话题和她聊了。
唉。
看得出她很努力的不要显露出疲态；这是我的错，因为我得承认我这个人实在是太无聊了。
所以我才不断说她很nice.
要和一块木头聊天并非易事。
呵呵。
接着送她到她的合唱团的练习地，间中发生了以下的事件让我印象很深刻。
在每扇地铁的滑动式门上都贴有类似“请小心缝隙”的警示贴纸。
可是巧玲说哪有人那么笨，会把高跟鞋的后脚跟插到缝隙里面去。
然后我便答道，贴纸可能是用于提醒小朋友的吧。
她回道，贴纸的位置那么高，小朋友是不会注意的。
想想，贴纸的位置高于我的脖子，少说也有1.7米高。
她接道，倘若把自己当作小朋友，那么便可以了解到要望向那张高高的贴纸，还真的不容易。
所以，我们便把警示贴纸能警惕小朋友的可能性删除了。
然后，巧玲便说那可能是用于警惕脚丫特别小的人吧。
我说也有可能是提醒脚板放横着行走的人吧。
所以，贴纸的用途便仅限与告诫这两类人出入地铁车厢时要小心。
综上所诉，新捷运可能为了一个不甚有效的讯息传达方式浪费了不少钱。
呵呵。

这么有趣的一个人，碰上宛如木头人的我。。
委屈你咯，巧玲。。。抱歉抱歉。

等等便要回到军营里去了~
我是千百个不愿意啊。。
唉。

It's always food

2008-11-22T22:58:00.003+08:00

22.11.2008
Bummer of sorts.
In the end, Ting Zhou couldn't make it(or for that matter, don't want to) for dinner, Kaiyun ends work quite late, and Grace seemed to be moody... and thus, the gathering was cancelled. Haha.
It was quite fortunate that Cheng Ai happened to be hunting for dinner also, and thus I asked him out together with me to have a quick meal. Ultimately we ended up Botak Jone's Western Food branch in Clementi and we had some large servings of fish and chicken for me and him respectively. It proved to be too large a portion of food, and I reeled up wanting to throw up.
After dinner I decided that it was a little early, and dragged him to play pool with me at a sports centre nearby, before heading to the coffee shop just by Clementi Stadium to have some 汤圆.. yum. :)

Tomorrow morning I would be meeting the gang for dim sum! :) And in the afternoon meeting 巧玲 for lunch! Hee~ happy~
Just don't let it be like the gathering today.. >.<

=.+

2008-11-22T14:44:00.002+08:00

22.11.2008
It's been a while since I blogged, simply because there isn't much to blog about.
Work is going to pile up soon.
And I'm looking forward to the dinner later with the gang, and movies.. though I forgot which film they proposed watching.

And over the course of the week, I've seriously come to realize this: Never, never, never take anyone as what they are without at least trying to understand what they are like, or risk getting your sanity throttled within an inch of your life. Heh.

I should be going out to get a rank sewn, but I just don't feel like moving an inch. :)
So just let me while today away...

Notes

2008-11-15T23:04:00.002+08:00

15.11.2008
1. Feel stupidly emotional.
2. Bought my Ipod Classic, along with a case that is too big.
3. Bought a new wallet to replace my old one.
4. Hating iTunes.
5. Feeling very empty.
6. Not yet dead.
7. But wish I could be 6- feet- under instead.

Rants

2008-11-02T16:40:00.002+08:00

3.11.2008
The 9 days of idling is going to end, as tomorrow marks the start of the UIP in my new unit.
Not much had happened in the course of the mini holiday. I spent most of the time reading manga and playing Valhalla Knights 2.
Perhaps only the weekends are the only days I am looking forward to now, that I can spend some time with the usual gang.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Caught Tropic Thunder with Kaiwen, Kaiyun and Meng yesterday.
It's still a good watch, despite me having seen it already.
The real value of the movie is, well, it has no value.
It is pure silly fun. :)
---------------------------------------------------------------
Am arranging my songs collection, and am filling in the missing parts to some albums.
Owing to the loss of my Zen (dammit)I would rather desperately need to get a new mp3 player.. that is after I saved up enough. :(
But still, I am still contemplating which one to get...

The following list is in no particular order with respect to preference or price or whatnot. >.<
1. Ipod Classic
2. Ipod Touch... (despite the nightmares that this thing,or lack therein, gave me)
3. Zen X-Fi
4. Sony S710
5. Samsung P2 (hell this thing is pretty..)
6. Toshiba Gigabeat T400

But... If I were to look at capacity... the Ipod Classic would probably beat all other players hands down. Argh. And for a person who has a colossal music collection such as myself, perhaps only a behemoth such as the Classic would be able to hold my library for my aural pleasure on the go.
---------------------------------------------------
Thus, shopping for the right player would hopefully come soon. Haha.

不想长大

2008-10-31T15:21:00.002+08:00

31.10.2008
旧地重游。。。。
看见自己部落格里的一则一则，有一种很怅然的感觉。
活该。
----------------------------------------------------------------
最近的假日很多，搞得我在家里闷得发慌。
大家都各忙各的，唯独我好像格格不入。
唉。
----------------------------------------------------------------
没事干，只好在MSN和旧交们闲聊。
昨天和钰婷聊得蛮夜的，感觉不错。
她还是那个老样子，不爱和人们打交道。
呵呵。
还有，和她谈话时我发现我还没回母校取自己的Testimonial. 呵呵。。
两年了。。
反观当时多么渴望长大的我，现在却是不想长大。。。
如果不用长大的话，那就不用在生活的大道上碰得满脸是灰。。。
如果不用长大的话，就不用天天为了种种问题而忧。。
如果不用长大的话。。就不会遇见她们两个，也许现在的我也不会是现在这个残缺的我了。哈。
----------------------------------------------------------------
突然很想哭。哈哈。久违了的眼泪。。。决堤吧。。

Graduation

2008-10-28T17:18:00.002+08:00

28.10.2008
Booked out today after the simple graduation ceremony earlier in the morning... would be booking back in tomorrow morning to move to Selarang Camp.
My new home.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Am thankful for everyone in the EODCC that helped me a lot along the way, especially in areas of science that I simply have no clue about, and made my time in the course very enjoyable.
Thanks to Benjamin for being a nice buddy... :)
Thanks to Ying Jie for being a patient course leader.. and fetching me and Ben back home if he can... and for giving me his SOG. >.< he's a very nice person, and I am very grateful. :)
Thanks to all of you guys, that made me feel I am not less able than any of you... :)
-------------------------------------------------------------
Looking forward to the unit life.. though it means sacrificing some weekends.. haha.

Thou shalt not drink...

2008-10-27T12:51:00.002+08:00

27.10.2008
Yes. I shall not drink with a heavy heart anymore... Looking at the mess I created... terrible.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
And damn it, I think I lost my mp3 player. Oh well. Perhaps that would be a good reason for me to get a new one? :)

送你。离开

2008-10-26T08:25:00.002+08:00

26.10.2008
现在时间是8.31 am.
---------------------------------------------------------------
昨天，一行人在机场送走了庭州，因为他得到台湾接受为期三个星期的训练。
可是到头来大家都有点累了，所以只留下宏明和我留下陪庭州到更晚些。
然后，我看见了铮泉，接着就想到可能绣也有在场。
伸长了脖子，左探右索，却没有她的影子。
不知怎么的。。在这之后，心里有一种蛮落寞的感觉。。。

不禁自嘲。
今非昔比啊。纵使能见面，也未必能谈谈吧。
她活得好好的，我这个十恶不赦的混蛋，就别再乱想了吧。
呵呵。
---------------------------------------------------------------
庭洲入闸后，我便到明的家里，和他看了一出满有趣的电影，《Fight Club》.
接着，我便回家了。
然后，便梳洗了一番，接着就坐在电脑前乱打字。呵呵。
突然，对这首歌有了更确切的感触。。。

你在那里这些年来如意不如意
还快乐还单纯还美丽时光如何对你

我在这里人海中一座岛屿
很平静风平浪静
只除了深夜里回忆会疯狂来袭

我很想你你知道吗
如果可以就让我再见你
美好微笑清澈眼睛
好确定那场分离只毀了我一个而已

我很想你听见了吗 woo...
这是唯一我无解的困境
那些过去不肯过去
不管我后来遇见多少人
只能叹息都不是你

洞

2008-10-19T11:17:00.002+08:00

19.10.2008
昨天的我心情有一点灰，自己一个人到了一些地方去。
到裕廊东一带逛逛，然后到金文泰吃汤圆，接着到海滨坊的Starbucks，喝着一杯黑咖啡，在崭新的日记本里写了第一则日记，
然后心碎。
哈。
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
和庭州，凯云，凯文和伟在红茂乔看了一出电影，《House Bunny》。
故事表面上很肤浅，其实不然。
虽然这部电影包含的寓意浅然易见，谈不上很精彩，可是却不失温馨。
这类电影虽然没有像Love actually那般"feel good"，可是从一个兔女郎的世界看人与人之间的关系还是头一遭。
蛮不错的。
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
剧终后我和庭州到了Jane那里喝了两杯。
庭州揶揄我，说我连续两周到访那里是有目的的。
。。。
所以，我对庭州解释道：

我们的世界里，可以再分程更小的世界。
两个截然不同世界的人因某种原因相识，并不代表一定有空间发展。
。。
与其说发展，不如说互动吧。
哈哈。
可以隔着一道玻璃墙去观察和欣赏，可是两个人却无法真正有互动。

接着庭州便说我是Bird Trainer.
我问为什么？
他说我满嘴鸟话。
哈哈哈。。。
----------------------------------------------------------------------
空洞，真的弥补得上吗。。

Gap

2008-10-12T14:18:00.002+08:00

12.10.2008
Just booked out yesterday, only to be booking back in again later today... The consolation is that after the summary exercise 2 weeks later we would be having an off- in- lieu for the P. Senang trip. Haha..

Met up with Lynette yesterday and chatted a little. I admit that it was my mistake to ask her out for coffee, given that we aren't really conversationalists.. haha..
The actual highlight for the session was the realization that my gap between them and myself is wider than what I had thought it to be.

Looking at the way they think, the activities that they engage in, right down to their body language... I am actually a little envious of them.. That's exactly the plus of being a student that doesn't have to pay their own dues; they can be ccarefree. Haha. Lynn rolled her eyes each time I poked fun at myself for being an old man of sorts, and though perhaps she took it for a nonsensical comment from me, hell, that's exactly how I felt. Bah.

Oh, and I felt that it was a wonder for her to stay single for that long. She apparently ain't the type to be proactive in the dating game, but I tried to convince her otherwise, but I have no idea how much of that went in. Haha... Is it really still the norm for guys to take the lead? I haven't got anything to base a guess upon, now that I am in the army...

Ah. And I am appreciative of the cookies and a piece of brownie she gave me, which ultimately served as my breakfast today. Haha... :)

---------------------------------------------------------------------
It's nice to meet up with people (or should it be friends? Haha...)that I haven't seen in a while, even just to observe how they are and how they had changed. Lynn asked me while I was walking her back (upon my insistence) if she had changed. On the facade I would say no, but it seemed that after everything that she had gone through... she seemed to be more reserved in a feminine way. I wouldn't say that was a succinct enough description but hell, I couldn't find a proper way to put it across.
Perhaps it would be more definitive to say that taking her as a sky, it is now slightly shrouded with clouds; not that it stops light from permeating through, but it simply isn't as bright..
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Thereafter I went to Millions, talked to Jane for a bit, humoured myself in the process to get rid of the boredom of a rainy Saturday night, had a few rounds of beer and headed home. Haha. Would that be what a typical guy my age would do..?
Not really. Not really.
Hence the gap.

In eternal memory of my grandma

2008-10-03T15:52:00.002+08:00

3.10.2008
我的阿嬷走了。
那天，我在兵营街道厄讯之后，便赶到阿嬷的家里，大家都到了。
阿嬷终于走了。
------------------------------------------------------------------------
为期四天的停柩里有许多让我看了不舒服的事情，好在都不严重。
哭哭啼啼中，夹杂着两个朋友的慰问。我很感激她们。。
很快，便到了今天，阿嬷在中午时分，于自度庵里火葬了。
------------------------------------------------------------------------
全程中，我没有流泪。
阿嬷是我的亲人，我不可能不难过。
只是，众多不甚熟识的亲戚在场，大哭一场似乎自是在做一场戏。
而在场已有许多戏子，我认为我不应和他们抢戏份。
我，让泪化成思念，留在心里，流在身体里。
------------------------------------------------------------------------
阿嬷，一路好走。。

KTV at 13.9.08

2008-09-19T22:50:00.002+08:00

19.9.08
Funny how I am blogging about something that happened a week ago. Haha. Well, this is partly because I was waiting for Michelle to post the photos somewhere that I can grab before posting it here. So here goes:

First up, the guy that has enlisted for 4 days now and some of the girls:

Then, more of him with the girls... haha...

More Tan Wee.. though this photo's quite disturbing.

Some more Tan Wee... you got to say he's a good looking guy if he'll spare himself the baring of teeth...

Therein follows Chapter 2: Michelle and her narcissism. Hahaha~
Then there is subsection 1, which is her alone.

And then there is subsection 2, which is Grace and her.

I like this one. :)

That's quite heavy. Up next, is Michelle with the rest of the girls that were present that night.

This is Chapter 3: The party and Michelle.

1st.. eh..though I don't really understand why they are doing this. Anyone care to enlighten me?

This is Michelle with Ting Yu, Wee's self- proclaimed sister. Haha.

The girls...

Grace, Michelle and Samantha.

With Grace looking drunk and Michelle in the background in a very awkward position.

Michelle and Kaiwen. Oh Kaiwen was wearing a tube that night, so yes, the coat that the more observant ones could spot on her belongs to yours truly. :)

Michelle and Kaiwen also... I am highly amused by this scene.

Ah ha. Michelle with Ting Yu and Ting Yu's boyfriend, whose name I could not really remember. Pardon me...

The girls...

Kaiwen and Michelle... somehow the shot angle makes Kaiwen seem as though.. *ahem*...you know...

The girls...

The girls in a slightly different posture...

Ah, the other girls. Very apologetic to the lady on the far left of the photo, whose name I could not remember too. Ah.. the ails of being an old man. Pardon me, pardon me.

Reminds you of Do-Re-Mi..? Hahaha~

The ultimate toilet shot.

Which brings me to Chapter 4, the shots that I would term Miscellaneous.

The drunk taking a pic, probably.

The phantom effect. ~~

I didn't comprehend the purpose of this shot...

...Or neither this one...

... Because I find shot are generally ruined by me. Argh.

Last but not least, Grace and Michelle with me...

Sigh. It would have been nice... but... the details I guess I left in my previous post, so that's it for tonight..

Would blog more about my suicidal tendency tomorrow... hahaha....

Will work for Love

2008-09-14T19:31:00.002+08:00

As above. Haha, I don't even know why I am doing this.. I think I'm getting delirious...
---------------------------------------------------
EDIT: Realized that Usher's had a song on this...

Can you help me?
Anybody out there help me
Please can you help me?

Excuse me mister
I fell on hard times
I need some help
But don't need a dime
Don't turn away
I'll wash your clothes
If you let me stay
(I'll) find your remote,
Day after day
People walk by
I can't catch their eye
I hold up my sign

It says
Will work for love
I will I will I will I'll work for love
Overtime baby
It says will work for love
I will I will I will I'll work for love
For all my life
I will work for love

Can you help me? (help me)
Anybody out there help me (if there's anybody out there)
Please can you help me?
Excuse me you two
Got love to spare?
Search my whole heart
It ain't none in there
What makes a star
I'm on my last
Don't have no love
That's okay God blessed
Day after day
People walk by now
I can't catch their eyes
Holding up my sign

It says
Will work for love
I will I will I will I'll work for love
Overtime baby
It says will work for love
I will I will I will I'll work for love
For all my life
I will work for love

I remember the day I lost my heart (hey yeah)
Took it for granted I went too far
Fall down, crying and beg
To feel that love again
I'll Hold this sign till the very end
Do anything

I will will I will I'll work for love,
Overtime baby
It says will work for love
I will will I will I'll work for love
For all my life
I will work for love

Stressed

2008-09-14T18:15:00.002+08:00

14.9.2008
Am now undergoing study at EODCC.
Lots of things to learn about.
Interesting, but inherently difficult and tedious.
I don't want to fail the course...
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Went out with the gang yesterday.
Wee's enlisting soon, on Tuesday... time for him to go through service just like everyone of us Singaporean guys.
Well, with his injuries and such he should just downgrade his PES status, but he's just too stubborn to do that. Argh.
Ok, back to the outing.
Met up with them at Plaza Singapura at noon, then went to buy stuff for use in camp and also signed up for a new line with Starhub. :)
Got a new phone too. Hee..
After that Wee and Kaiwen met up with 2 other ladies(one of which I think her name is Kelly, but I seriously forgotten the other) and then Grace and her 2 friends.
Dinner was supposed to be at Lau Pa Sat, Raffles Place, but then things cropped up that caused that venue to be instead changed to Xing Wang Cha Chan Teng at Cineleisure.
Ting Zhou and I spoke at some length to what we felt about Wee's style of handling Kaiwen. Well, no one's to say who's at fault here, as I felt, but Ting Zhou seriously felt otherwise. Haha, very different modes of thought here.
Over dinner I got to know briefly who is Ting Yu and her boyfriend, but since I wasn't formally introduced to them I wouldn't say I had the pleasure of their acquaintance yet. Haha.
Also another person I got to know was Jiawen(or so I think... damn I am bad with names), a girl that had some former relations with Ting Zhou. Ah ha. This session of dinner that brought them face to face again led to something interesting at the end of the night.
A Kbox session was in place after dinner at Kallang Leisure Park, where Kaiyun's boyfriend was working at. The session wouldn't be half bad without the alcohol, seriously. The girls threw down shots and soon Kaiyun was back to her drunken antics(damn it was intensely out of control...) and kaiwen complained of breathlessness. Argh.
The problem with Kaiyun was that after she was drunk she gets a little touchy, at least on me, that I wasn't exactly too comfortable with. I mean, how would you feel if your girl starts leaning and sticks a little close to some guy that you've never seen before after a couple of rounds of drinks? No offense to anyone, but I felt bad and somewhat embarrassed...
Night ended at 4.30 am in the morning, but I think a long phone call by Ting Zhou to Jiawen on Wee's cue made things interesting. Well I knew they spoke for some time, and makes me interested about Ting Zhou's intent. Haha...
------------------------------------------------------------------
And with a big POP! I am instantly displaced back into a stressed study environment. Hahaha... booking in later....

愿天下有情人终成眷属~

2008-09-06T16:52:00.001+08:00

6.9.2008
如题。。。似乎大家都成双成对的，羡煞老男人我了。哈哈~
凯云昨天突然传我一则简讯，说她名花有主咯~恭喜恭喜。。呵呵。。
要珍惜厚～

Blogging at the mess, Nee Soon Camp

2008-09-03T19:18:00.002+08:00

3.9.2008
It's a rainy day, and quite surprising for a day at ETI to pass without much activities. But here am I, at the mess, blogging away on a system home to the SAF called the I- NET that supposedly is used to transmit information over the web that is classified as "below classified". Hmph. And to think that blogs are often the largest source of controversy pertaining to this aspect. Haha.. irony again..
The rest of the course had a little break off for the night, and 3 minutes after they proceeded out of the camp, I started to regret. So it turns out that Kaiyun is having the day off and is rotting at home. Argh. Had I known, I would have met her for dinner or something... It's really, really wasted...
----------------------------------------------------------------
Counting down 6 days to our passing out here at ETI. The big joke now is that green berets are supposed to be the normal beret but every male is getting, but instead amongst Hayden, Ting Zhou and myself only TZ has that. Haha. He got so infuriated talking about it the last time that he swore he would talk to the OC of Golf Coy in a desperate bid to get into Guards. >.< I laughed my head off, simply. :)
---------------------------------------------------------------
Miss you guys. You known who you are...